Faith

The boxed DVD set for all five seasons of Angel was released this week. Cleverly timed, I'm sure, to coincide with Halloween and all. And no offense, but I only ever watched Angel when Eliza Dushku was on workin' the Faith role. I just adore Dushku, and Faith was the most exciting, problematic, fucked up mess of a hero ever conceived. Oh Faith, many misunderstand you, but not I, darling. Not I. Or me, either.

BigFoot for Halloween

The Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization has several images posted taken by R. Jacobs' remote camera positioned in the Allegheny National Forest in Northwestern Pennsylvania.

Excuse me while I have my' what the fuck moment' here.

At first I thought, oh, it's a mangy bear, but then I started talking to my sister, Junior, and we decided that yeah, it's Bigfoot.

So that settles that.

Itty Bitty Lives Down To Its Name

Miss Kitty insisted that we had to attend at least one movie at the Pittsburgh Gay and Lesbian Film Festival, and since I didn't have a counter argument, we picked the closing night's screening of 'Itty Bitty Titty Committee'.
Where to begin? This movie is so flawed that it shouldn't be shown anywhere that alcohol isn't being served. To call it directionless is too kind. Too call it a disaster of epic proportions is unfair to the word epic.
Given how much we loved director Jamie Babbitt's previous effort, 'But I'm A Cheerleader' we had high hopes for 'Itty Bitty'. But those hopes were seriously compromised once we learned that the movie would cost 15 bucks a pop. Call me crass and cheap, but if you are going to charge twice the going rate for a movie, that movie better deliver in spades. This movie was more like Old Maid. Every tired cliche about feminism, lesbianism, and feminist/lesbian activism is lamely trotted out. It's nothing more than an exercise in recycling. The only remotely fresh aspect in the movie was that none of the characters had any heart and all of the relationships were emotionally vapid and devastating. The only thing I can think to liken the way that the characters lied and bed jumped to was that Babbitt directed this hodge podge like a five year old playing with dolls, manipulating the characters actions in the most famously Mary Sue fashion that she could muster.
Not a single aspect of this film worked. It was shot on the cheap and it showed, clunky acting, horrid script, bizarre dystopic direction, and other stuff too.
Do yourself a favor and skip this film. Instead, write your own and retrieve your My Little Pony collection from your parents' cellar to enact the action.

Danger!

This was the fortune that George W. Bush pulled from his cookie over the past weekend when he ordered Mei Fun and spring rolls take out from Number 1 China House while watching the boxed DVD set of 'Dallas' season two with Whiskey Jane Taylor and Pervy McNulty. Afterwards they styled each others hair and played pin the bomb on Iran. Though this information is highly classified, Whiskey Jane has a loose tongue after a few shots of George Dickel.

Soup

Today I'm trying once again to make vegetable chowder, a soup I often leave on the burner too long and it gets scorched. So, wondered my brain, what lurks in my subconscious that wants to sabotage the chowder? I looked deep, deep into the core of my being, turning over a myriad of buried disarticulated skeletons and you know what I found? The Timex Cinderella watch I had as a kid!
Whew. Glad I solved that mystery. Soup success is surely guaranteed now.

The Bad Spidey Tingling

My life, at times, is beset by ironies. Just the other day I was obsessing about how my basement is the spider kingdom and how I'm phobic about spiders and he whole nine yards...and now the hot water tank has taken a bath and I'm down in the cellar, dodging the cobwebs and shutting off the water and the gas. Sheesh. Surely spiders realize that we're terrified of them, they've got to understand that they're hideous creatures. All those legs and eyes. And the eyes are heaped up on top of each other like pustules or something! *shudder*

Well, all I know is that The Snake Doctor (tm) better get here pretty quick and replace the hot water tank because I'm not going down there again. Spiders can smell fear.

Monday Randomness

I really should be doing something productive, like posting more of my collection of the curious and really weird on ebay. Maybe later.
For now I'm still thinking about the awful loss the Steelers suffered last night in Denver. And what is up with Faith Hill singing that bizarre Sunday Night Football song? It's set to the tune of Joan Jett's recentish classic, "I Hate Myself For Loving You", but the SNF version lacks all of the self mocking snarkiness. Meaning, it lacks the in your face beauty and spirit of the original and comes across as a lame mashy rip-off with silly football hype lyrics. And I use the term 'lyrics' loosely. Whoever penned those words should be spanked, and not in the fun way. Plus, I thought Ms. Hill had more sense than this! Isn't this the kind of gig Toby Keith would take?

Also, I'm sorry that the Cleveland Indians lost the ALCS. I'm kind of fond of the Tribe by proxy because our own Pittsburgh Pirates are cellar dwellers, so I have to pick somebody else to root for (a non NL team). Since I'd picked up an Indians shirt at the thrift store I figured it was kismet. And now we're stuck with the Red Sox, and I'm so sick of them. Yes, a few years ago I wanted them to win the world series, and now I just want them to slink back into frustration and bitter disappointment and leave the rest of us alone. Like the Cubs.